The Beginning...

I am basically doing a cut and paste of my initial email and then I'll go from there....

-As of today we're going ahead to evaluate Gavin for a autism diagnosis. Normally it takes 3-6 months. We've got our team pulling for us to ideally speed up that process.

We've been given the permission by everyone as of today to start learning, researching and looking at schools that are focused on kids with Autism. We're going to take the time during Kurt's leave from work to devour the system and all it has to offer. It gets a little crazy at times! Through Part C we have the resources of Respite Care for the twins. Respite care workers can come to our home and stay with the kids while we're out pounding the pavement looking at schools. We're starting with them next week. I think we're in a wonderful place right now for Gavin.

This diagnosis will open alot of doors of opportunity for Gavin. Everyone agrees that getting the diagnosis before he's turned over to the school district makes THE difference. Not A difference, but THE difference. So, we're looking to the positive side of that.

I am officially mad for once. We accept it. It won't ever change the way we love Gavin, look at Gavin or treat Gavin. But right now we're feeling like screaming and asking *Why Gavin????* It's not about us, his sister, brother, mom, dad, extended family.... Our job doesn't change. It might be a little more intensive, busy, overwhelming, but we signed up for that when we chose to have kids. Preemie or not. Sick or not. Able or not. But Gavin didn't ask for this. And doesn't deserve it. We look at him and see pure perfection. We see a kid wired differently, but we take that and turn it into seeing a kid with opportunity we didn't have ourselves and wouldn't have without him. Looking at the world differently then you were taught has really been a positive experience for us. With this we've met people we've never thought we would. We've found support in people we never thought we would. And because of that our world is richer, and a little more vibrant. It can't be all that bad right?

As I've said before, it's like planning for Italy and landing in Holland. I love that piece of writing. Holland is beautiful. Makes me wonder why I didn't think of going there. Still doesn't change that Kurt and I hoped for Italy. We didn't quite make it with Gavin. But as all the wonders of the world have more to offer than the human brain imagined, so does he. So much more than we ever thought we'd feel, learn and know. And, we've got Gavarooski to thank for that.

I'll update when I can and let everyone know of his progress. Some of you respond with such positive words and it means so much to us.

"The difference you make might be all the difference it will take"